One of the more common human dynamics when it comes to our relationships, our businesses, and our business relationships is a flat, two-dimensional spectrum, both ends of which lead nowhere great. Yet, in the right moments, they each appear rather inviting.
Let me explain.
Imagine that you send an email to a potential lead or client. Some time goes by and your expectation for a timely answer goes unfulfilled. You begin to inch along toward one end of that spectrum – attachment. The more time that goes by, the more attached you become to that specific outcome. Emotion builds until at some point, the switch flips and boom! You’re outta there. It may sound like, “I don’t care,” or “Whatever,” or even “Eff it!”
Congratulations you’ve just moved toward the other side of the spectrum – resignation! You’re resigned. You’ve given up. And likely, you’ll hang out in defeat and resignation for a few minutes, a few hours, or even a few days or weeks. Eventually your ego “heals,” and you decide to try again. And so begins the slow return back to attachment. At some point an expectation goes unfulfilled once again and pop! Back to resignation.
And there we ping and pong, back and forth, between attachment and resignation, attachment and resignation.
So how do you get out of this flat, awful, unproductive, power leak of a dynamic?
There is another place to choose from…
Get present to what it is you’re committed to. In business, maybe it’s money and the financial security it can provide. In relationships, perhaps it’s love, or connection, or joy. Maybe your highest commitment in life is freedom, balance, service, adventure, or any other value that gets you out of bed in the morning.
Whatever your commitment is, get clear and present to it. Then take action in service of it. In the example I gave perhaps it’s another email, or a phone call. Or maybe it’s a combination of both.
We don’t need to get stopped by the mere circumstances of others, whom we can’t control anyway.
Take action from commitment without attachment to specific outcomes. And watch all of that power circle back into your possession and generate your results!