Good morning! It’s a good looking room today. Pretty full. Looking around, we’re about – what would you say – 60 plus? Sixty people; sixty egos. Now, to be clear, let’s not relate to the word “ego” in the colloquial manner. Typically it’s not a very positive thing. But today, let’s take the judgment out of it and think of ego like identity.
They’re essentially a conglomerate of our experiences, evidence, and stories. It’s who we think we are and who we portray to the world and ourselves. The ego tends to be defined by our edge – where we contrast to others and the world. It’s what has us constantly comparing ourselves – consciously and unconsciously. Remember, connection, acceptance, and love are potent potions. So sizing it all up – ourselves, others, where we fit, can be supportive.
We form opinions based on these filters of self. And we gravitate toward what fits, what’s in alignment with what we think. It often leaves us with a sense of security, of being right. The ego loves to be right about things. It’s what sustains our sense of self.
Being right has it’s value, but it’s not without it’s cost. Because it tends to leave some other entity as “wrong” in contrast. Now if you root for a sports team – like say the Islanders (right Michael Nerenberg?), it’s fun to be “right” in a group and to make the other team wrong.
But in relationships – friendships, romantic partnerships, and business relations, trying to be right about things can get in the way of success.
As you’ve probably heard the wise and thought provoking question, “Would you rather be happy or right?” Or as I like to call it, “Being on ‘Right Island.'” Sure you’re right, but you’re also by yourself, disconnected.
So today I invite you to take a look and see where and how you’re trying to be right about something. About someone. It may be selling someone short. And that person may even be you. We like to be right about ourselves too – what we can and can’t do.
Who are you holding some energy on? And what is it standing in the way of? Could it be a sale, or a deal? Or keeping yourself or a client happy? Your sense of peace? Could it be the thing in the way of you getting to the next level? Or creating a referral for someone at these tables?
Consider that being right is over rated. Be smart, be successful, be happy, be inspired and inspiring. Be anything authentic that serves you and your business.
Just show up and be – for it’s own sake, and for that which you’re creating. Rather than needing the validating contrast with others.
The more connection you create, the more business you create.